I'd become comfortable. I'd accepted the fact that I must survive...thrive in this world without my soul mate. It became acceptable. It became something other than a curse.
Then it happened. News. News that I was not supposed to deal without him by my side. News that made me want to screw the comfortable and scream for the past. News that I didn't know how to take.
Today is just one of those days where I wanted to talk about how grateful I am for my fellow widows.
The women that pull me out of a funk, the women that give me hope, the women that know the unspoken words in my heart, the women that know the depth and never-ending length of my love.Read more
"What do I do now?"
"Where do I go?"
"How do I live?"
These are just a few of the many questions so many of us ask after the loss of our counterpart...our soul mate.
I've always taken my own path. I like the fresh, uncharted dirt beneath my feet, the barren terrain of land not crossed by others. Yes, as Michael would say, I lived in the clouds, a world of my own, but he never tried to change that, and in all honesty, I think it's one of the things he loved so much about me. It's the Christopher Columbus in me, which did lead me to him to begin with.Read more
I just returned from England and decided to sift through posts I wrote on my first "once-in-a-lifetime" trip after Michael was killed. This poem sums it all up...My life here without him...my presence on this earth...my impact from that which he embedded in my being.
The sentiments and feelings are still the same...as well as the love:
After Michael was killed my equilibrium for life was off. How things and actions made by me were gauged, I can't quite say would fall under the category of "adventure", as my reasoning behind certain decisions was semi-based off the hope that maybe I'd join Michael sooner than later.Read more
This weekend I'll be at the Austin City Limits Music Festival. 8 stages, over a hundred bands, but to me it is so much more.
Last October, my best friend (and fellow widow) and I ventured out on the green grass, drinking wine from sports bottles, listening to amazing music, having a grief/stress free time.
It's that time of year.
That time where I'm able to fulfill one of the biggest dreams Michael and I had.
To travel across the world.
I found this photo. Simply a picture of a memorial for some strangers lost loved one.
Raw. Honest. Candid.
Words that can be used to define the words left to commemorate this soul, this being.
What would yours say?
I lived one.
I ran 5 days a week, did ab workout DVDs, went biking with Michael, and a little more here and there.