Oh My God! I'm So Sorry! I Just Heard...

Time goes on and life begins to settle. You think you are past the hardest conversations until you get a message from out of the blue…

“Oh My God! I’m So Sorry! I Just Heard”

These words come in a text message, a social media tag, in an email and, rarely, in a phone call. Mine came just a few minutes ago through Facebook. It’s one of those messages you don’t ever expect from someone you really never thought you’d hear from again and you dread reading it. To be honest I did really look at my phone and say to myself “What in Gay Hell?” That’s a movie quote from Too Wong Foo. Tin loved that movie and I use that quote more often these days. It usually gets a good laugh.

As if we are really friends with everyone we call “Facebook Friends”, there is a sharper edge to the knife when the person that reaches out is someone that never really thought much about others unless they needed something. They gush over just how wonderful your person was and how sad. I have little patience nowadays as I figure out what to do with my new unwanted freedom. I need to fill my abundant time alone with things that allow me to feel and process but not trigger the feelings like I’m back reliving “D” day. I need to focus on the essential things in life and their importance in rebuilding my foundation.

I know that there are those people who honestly do care and didn’t know because life pulls us together and apart. That message I would have been saddened by but not annoyed..

“How are you?”

How the Hell do you think I am? Seriously, why is this a question? Can we please all get together and write a comedy of all the things that make us roll our eyes, cringe, want to lay on the ground and, most importantly, want to just smack someone upside the head? Can we? All you bloggers are obviously writers so let’s start assigning Chapters! LOL! I have to joke and laugh because, if I didn’t, I would cry.

How am I? How am I? In all honesty, I can’t tell you because I haven’t had enough time to learn who I am…

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  • Cathy
    commented 2018-10-08 07:45:43 -0700
    Bryan, you’ll get asked “how are you?” over and over and over. I usually respond “I am” or “I am doing” if they’ve asked “how are you doing?” It’s so very hard to say more than that and be truthful. What they want to hear is that you’re doing great, but we all know that is not the correct answer for you now, maybe not for many years to come. You have to remember that if they haven’t experienced a loss, they really have no idea of where you’re at, how much you miss him, etc. It isn’t an easy road to be on, but there are many on it, and many to follow. I keep trying to prepare those who will follow, those who are asking the questions. Even tho the questions may elicit an “What in Gay Hell?!”