commented on Today I'am Ok But Not Everyday
2017-11-16 17:57:30 -0800
It is 8.5 months. I am not okay. I don’t see any path to ever being okay.
I have put one foot in front of the other with the hope I would one day walk out of this fog and find myself in the world again. I seem to have only two states of being, zombie-like lack of connection or feeling to anything, or unbearable sorrow.
I think I was an incomplete person before I met my husband. For 40 years, he made me better than I was alone. We were good for each other. Now, my better half, is gone. Sometimes it is so hard just to breathe, and I have less and less interest in trying.
I don’t know that I will survive the loss of my husband. That might be okay.