Some days I just lay there.
Or sit there.
Or stand there.
I get lost in feeling numb.
Patience was never my strong suit. And it’s a difficult thing to be patient when everything has felt so empty for so long and all you desire is to fill whole again.
I can see that light at the end of the tunnel. It’s a very long tunnel however.
Sometimes I get tired of walking in the dark.
Sometimes I have to be still for a moment and realize that I’m still moving forward, despite the fact that I can see nothing in front of me.
It can be discouraging when you can’t see the destination.
But it’s important to remember one thing: all paths lead somewhere.
So if you have to stop for a moment. It’s okay. Just don’t stop indefinitely, because there is a destination to be reached.
All paths lead somewhere.
Depression is a tricky thing.
You never really know when it will happen. It just creeps up on you. At least, that’s what it did to me this week.
I miss my wife, but that wasn’t the catalyst this time. Or maybe it was. I’m not sure.
All I know is that I was down. For whatever reason. Unmotivated to do anything.
Existing monotonously to anyone and everyone around me, even myself.
I’ve made attempts to tame the beast, but the beast is me...and me is a person that I’ve never truly been able to control, at least not fully.
I sit in silence most days, hoping my thoughts will break the silence with something profound and inspiring. This week: nothing.
Sometimes, however, nothing is necessary.
It puts in perspective the somethings that exist in your life. That’s not even a profound thought. It’s just an observation.
Perhaps next week will be better.
We will see.