Daddy's Girl

joeyandry2.jpgFrom the moment our daughter, Ryann was born Joey was madly in love with her. She has always been his princess and although he loved his boys, his love for her was different. 
The worst part of Joeys passing has always been the pain the children feel. The fact that they will have to grow up without their dad and never be able to experience life with him. But Ryann's pain as always been the hardest. She remembers him not just stories about him. He actually remembers life with him. She cries out at night for him. It's heartbreaking. She is overly sensitive and emotional. She cries if a bug dies because death is real to her. She understands something children should not. 

joeyandry.jpgBut she also thrives at life. She is a good friend and student. She is good at anything she does. She first played t ball the year Joey died. He was her coach. He was supposed to coach her all the way to the big leagues. That was their plan. They had picture day on the day he died. The last picture taken of him was with her. 
Now two years later she is excelling at softball and really grasping the game. Every time I watched her on the field I think of him and how proud he would be of her. 
You can't help but to think of the future. Her future without him. Who will walk her down the aisle. Who will scare boys away when she is a teenager. And who will tell her it's ok when mom yells at her. I'm harder on her than my boys. I feel like I have to be. I want her to succeed in life. It's my job to keep her straight. But it was his job to sneak her candy and lay in bed with her at night when she couldn't sleep. So who does that now. 
My heart breaks for my daughter whose hero was taken away from her so young. He was the sun and the stars to her. She loved him so much. I hope she one day losses some of the pain but always remembers the love. 

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  • commented 2017-06-01 18:40:03 -0700
    My husband was also a big Orioles fan. He and my son had a plan to eventually go to every baseball stadium. He also loved music and used to play the guitar. He and my oldest daughter had a plan for her to learn guitar. He was going to help teach her. Bought all of this stuff I have no idea what to do with. My middle daughter also gets upset when I try to kill a bug. She was so angry at him at first for dying. My youngest still keeps one of my husband’s shirts in bed with her. She’s the one I worry about not remembering him. She was the one who never got a chance to go to the daddy daughter dance with him. Thus would have been the year, but he died last June. He was the patient one, the fun one that let them get away with everything, the one that didn’t yell. He was an important half of my life and of theirs. They’ll miss out on so much without him and though I try my best, I still feel like It’s not good enough.