I’m sitting at the airport this morning headed to spend the weekend with my best friend from junior high. It’s my 40th birthday weekend and I’m all over the place in my head. Today’s blog is more of a list of competing emotions rather than a discussion or story…Sometimes bullet points get “the point” across better. See what I did there? ;-)
Ok here goes:
- Turning 40! Excited and how the Hell did I get this old?
- Yay! Friends and fun!
- Yay a break from work!
- Oh God this is my first birthday without Clayton. Can I hold it together?
- What’s next? Holidays? Oh God I won’t have him for holidays!
- Do I want to even decorate? Too sad but he would want me to.
- Seriously 40? I did not envision my life would be so shaken up at 40. Ugh
- Ok deep breath! Birthday weekend!! I’m grateful for what I have but I’m also excited for presents :)
- Birthday cake! Oh damn with 40 candles! Good thing I brought my inhaler! LOL!
- I can’t have cake. My metabolism stopped at 35 and my height stopped at 5’6”. Too much cake and I’m going to be a hobbit by 41.
- Clayton would have laughed at that. I miss him. He always dropped me off and picked me up at airports. I loved seeing him there right when I got home. He won’t be in a few days. He won’t be for my next trip or any trip after. It’s kind of hard to be at home and to leave home.
- Ok back to the fact that I’m turning 40! Deep breath!
Can’t stop any of these events from coming so I might as well start enjoying every minute! Happy Birthday Bryan. You are doing good! One day at a time…