Rebecca Collins

"In the days following my husband's unexpected suicide, I turned to the internet for information and support - and found Soaring Spirits.  At 33, I didn't know anyone who had lost a spouse or anyone who had died from depression. I couldn't have felt more alone.  

Soaring Spirits gave me a community, some incredible life-long friends, and hope that there would be more to come for me.   The inspirational people whom I met through Widowed Village and Camp Widow helped me find my way through the most difficult time of my life.

Today, I chose to focus on how lucky I am to have met Daniel and to feel grateful for the lessons he taught me and the blessings he brought to my life.  I am determined to live a happy life, in honor of the dreams we had together. 

I also feel grateful to be able to pass on that same hope to those who are facing their own tragic loss, through the Soaring Spirits community."  

  • commented on Happy New Year 2016-01-09 04:37:39 -0800
    Thanks for sharing Mike, what a lovely start to 2016 for you and Sarah. Wishing you both the best :)

  • commented on Without You 2016-01-09 04:35:17 -0800
    I’m so sorry to hear about your mum Kelley. Sending love to you and your family.

  • commented on The Last Straggler 2016-01-02 05:00:07 -0800
    Wow, I LOVE this. Beautiful writing my friend, I was right there with you. Thank you for sharing.

  • commented on A Fear I Can't Ignore 2016-01-02 04:56:38 -0800
    Thank you Lisa xo

  • commented on Hopefully in Time 2016-01-02 04:55:57 -0800
    Thank you for your comments Teresa and Sharon. It can be so hard to explain to loved ones why I feel so alone, despite their support and companionship. I don’t want them to feel unappreciated or taken-for-granted, however the loneliness of grief is one of those things that you never fully understand until you’ve been there. I hope 2016 is treating you well so far xo

  • commented on The Waves of Grief 2015-10-11 04:01:13 -0700
    Thanks so much for your comments and support ladies. Lisa, I’m so sorry for what you’ve gone through. Kelley I had that same thought about the Castaway movie. Since Dan’s death, through my research and general need to understand depression and suicide, I have had (probably) hundreds of conversations with people who have felt suicidal – similar to your friend. I understand that they weren’t in control or making logical decisions, I know Dan didn’t want to die, I get that it’s a disease however unfortunately all of that knowledge can still fail me in the throes of grief. That’s one of the shitty things about a complicated grief.

  • commented on Remember the Fall 2015-10-03 00:07:34 -0700
    Thanks for continuing to share and be so open and honest Mike, I’m sure your words and courage are helping many.

  • commented on The Girl With the Crooked Smile 2015-10-03 00:05:53 -0700
    Thank you for sharing Stephanie, I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been going through this. And thank you for the reminder about how precious life is. Sometimes I still forget. Take care xo

  • commented on Over It 2015-10-03 00:03:07 -0700
    I could really relate to this. I miss my husband so much when I’m scared xo

  • commented on What Not to Talk About on a First Date... 2015-09-19 15:36:51 -0700
    Kelley Lynn – I want one to fall in my lap too!! Haha. Dating is tough, for sure, and after every disappointing experience I crawl back into my cave for a good month or so until I build up the energy to give it another crack. Putting myself out there is really tough but so is the idea of facing the rest of my life alone when I know in my heart that I’m ready to be part of a pair again (or at least give it a try!!). I guess that’s what motivates me to keep looking. Besides dabbling in the Internet dating world I’m also just trying to accept social invitations and get out in the world a bit more. As my friends keep reminding me, I’m not going to meet anyone while I’m sitting in my house!

  • commented on Suicide, my Life Sentence 2015-09-28 14:12:41 -0700
    Christy I’m disorder or your loss, it sounds like a long, difficult road for you and your family. Thank you for sharing about your experience, it really helps knowing I’m not alone – as much as I wouldn’t wish this pain on anyone.

    I’ve been struggling again this week with all the complicated emotions that come with such a tragic loss… Confusion, anger, guilt, abandonment. I have to keep reminding myself that Dan was very sick and the disease claimed his life. Your words have helped with this, so thank you for opening up.

    Sending love to you and your children xo

  • commented on What A Man Is 2015-08-31 04:32:01 -0700
    Oh man, this even made ME miss Don!! I wish you still had that. I wish I did too. I think Dan and Don were very similar (and not just the names, haha). He made me safe. And I was alone and independent for so bloody long before finding him! I’d paid my single-girl-dues and deserved this wonderful guy that I’d patiently waited for! Damn it.

  • commented on The Flowery Pit 2015-08-27 22:21:14 -0700
    I have only just gotten around to reading this and what a beautiful metaphor you’ve described. I’m so honored to have inspired you :)

  • commented on Seeing in Color 2015-08-27 22:19:45 -0700
    Reading this makes me so so sooooo happy! I love that you are seeing the colour again my friend :) Keep inspiring us with your words xo

  • commented on I Choose Love - Over and Over Again 2015-08-27 22:17:52 -0700
    Thank you Karen, I appreciate you taking the time to comment. My mum is back on her feet and feeling great – thanks!

  • commented on The Interview 2015-08-27 22:16:31 -0700
    How wonderful to be given this treasure of a new recording! You’ve reminded me that I’ve been meaning to video more footage of my parents, especially as they play with my nephews. I hope you arrive home well rested!

  • commented on Ian's Birthday Gift 2015-08-27 22:14:20 -0700
    I’ll miss your writing Kerryl (it’s been great having another Aussie to relate to!) but am so happy for you and your family xo

  • commented on The Anger isn't as Important as the Love 2015-08-09 22:28:28 -0700
    Yes, how strange that we had similar experiences! Thanks for your kind words. I understand what you’re saying, I am letting myself feel the anger and have been working through it with my grief counselor over the past couple of months. It still comes up at unexpected times but I’m getting more comfortable at sitting with it and working through it.

  • commented on A Big Little First 2015-08-09 22:14:51 -0700
    Yes! I LOVE This. Thank you for sharing so bravely. What Kelley said… this is now one of my favourite stories to follow!

  • commented on Happy for You, In Pain for Me 2015-08-07 19:48:59 -0700
    I’m so sorry to hear the wedding bought up so much raw emotion. I’m glad you had a posse of widows with you who understood, I imagine that would have made a huge difference. I’m sure your friend, the groom, and his new wife really appreciated you all making the effort. Thank you for sharing, sending you love from across the sea xo

Rebecca wed her darling Daniel in 2013, after a wonderful 18-months together. However, only six weeks after their wedding, Daniel died unexpectedly from depression. Widowed as a newlywed at 33, Rebecca re-built her life with help from Soaring Spirits
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