Don Yacona

  • commented on It's About Time 2019-12-03 11:19:08 -0800
    Absolutly right on all counts. and I REALLY hate “it will get better” I’ve been hearing that for 12 years, if it was going to “get better” then it would have already.

  • commented on Happy Birthday to Me 2019-12-02 12:07:05 -0800
    We became “us” on my birthday. that day always meant more to me than it being my birthday, i look at as the day we became a couple. Since she’s passed, it just becomes a worse day for me. I mark it by going to significant places in our relationship and reflecting, ok, having mini meltdowns.

  • commented on Remembering, Honoring, and Trying to Live on Thanksgiving 2019-12-02 12:02:32 -0800
    I could do without both of them, 3 really bad things happened before those two holidays.

  • commented on Raise Your Hand~ 2019-11-27 07:04:09 -0800
    I hate this “life”

  • commented on Be Thankful. Or Don't. Be Wherever You Are. 2019-11-25 13:24:30 -0800
    “Be thankful” makes me want to smack them and say “Be thankful I didn’t hit you harder and give you an extra one with the other hand”

  • commented on Surviving This 2019-11-22 11:25:55 -0800
    I think it was perfectly normal to have that thought after losing your person. Before she got sick, I became longterm unemployed for what turned out to be 4 1/2 years except for some freelance here and there, very spotty. About a year into this Hell, I felt that I was coming to the end if my rope, I was sending out 200 resumes a week, and either got no response, an “I’m sorry” response or an angry “I got this 5 times stop sending it response”. I was in my 50s, saw no prospects and had the place and the method picked out. I didn’t go through with it, obviously. After that, I started going to Mass in the morning during the week. No, I do NOT credit that with making my decision not to do the deed.

    Its a good thing I didn’t because her health issues got worse and worse, and finally, after Hurricane Sandy, things came to a head. Her health got worse and she had to go the hospital. 7 months later, we had to abandon the house because of delayed issues from the storm. I was unemployed, she was a dialysis patient that needed a triple bypass and we couldn’t sleep in our house, so with no job, we were going from hotel to hotel, not knowing where we were going to sleep more than two nights in advance. Then she and her sister made peace and we went there.

    30 months after she passed, and had had heart surgery, one leg amputated and the other going to be amputated, and after 5 heart attacks and a stroke, he body just said “no more”, and she passed.

    I truly believe that having watched and seen and experienced all that made me a stronger person, though I still vent publicly, and that fact that I am a believer who’s faith says that suicides go to the bad place has kept me from pulling the plug on myself.

    At least I like to thing so.

    Peace out

  • commented on Not What you Think~ 2019-11-20 10:58:34 -0800
    Love it. Laughter is medicine. I have a warped sense of humor, which I truly believe has helped save me….so far.

  • commented on Window to Grieve 2019-11-18 12:24:57 -0800
    I take the “DAY” off and make sure that I’m at her graveside at the time of her passing.

  • commented on Coffee Talk 2019-11-18 12:22:50 -0800
    I really miss having my cawffee with her in the morning

  • commented on You Have to be Kidding Me 2019-11-07 11:05:36 -0800
    1 and 6 just snd me into a whole new level of crazy

  • commented on What Now?... 2019-11-06 11:06:29 -0800
    I wish I knew

  • commented on I'll Suffer for You 2019-10-25 11:12:22 -0700
    Their suffering is over, ours will continue till we join them.

  • commented on Approaching a Year 2019-10-17 11:17:15 -0700
    I’m over 4 years out. She passed after a long and trying and painful illness with so much happening that if I ever wrote a book about it, I’d have to call it “You can’t make this up”. But for me, it will ALWAYS be 6/10/15 3:55 pm.

  • commented on Phases of Widow 2019-10-11 11:25:02 -0700
    I will never deny what I am, I can self Identify as being thin, have great eyesight and a full head of hair but it doesn’t make it true, the reality is, I’m fat, bald and nearsighted…and a widower, I own it. And don’t care who knows it or is uncomfortable with it.

  • commented on Wispy Love~ 2019-10-09 11:22:51 -0700
    beautifully written

  • commented on Diagnoses Date 2019-10-07 11:38:16 -0700
    In my case, diagnoses day is September 11, she tool a flop, skinned her knee, it wouldn’t heal and wound up in the hospital, where she was admitted and asked "how long have you been a diabetic?’ her answer was that she wasn’t, and they said oh yes you are and have been for a long time. I know it was September 11 because we were watching them read the names of the Trade Center victims on TV. the next year she lost a toe and was home bound for 6 months, and 5 years later, she was in the hospital with what proved to be kidney failure. 30 months later she passed, but it all started coming to the surface on September 11, 2006

  • commented on Dear Dead Husband 2019-10-04 10:57:26 -0700
    I and most who walk this path, will NEVER roll our eyes at you going back and sitting at that venue. You’re doing great.

  • commented on You Need to Move On 2019-08-23 10:56:35 -0700
    Thats a hot button for me, usually made by those who have not walked this path and will compare it to losing their 85yo aunt. We should be legally be allowed to throat punch anyone who makes that suggestion.

  • commented on Beauty and Darkness 2019-08-08 12:03:49 -0700
    Welcome Mari, very sorry for your loss.

  • commented on Death and Coffee 2019-07-29 13:08:07 -0700
    I get it. I was about to go into a bagel and coffee shop when I got a call from the hospital saying that Arlene coded and did I want them to do CPR. It took me 2 months to go back to that place and see the intersection (42nd st and 8th avenue in Manhattan) where I was frantically trying to get a cab to go running back to the hospital in time.