Kim Hamer

  • commented on Tired 2018-04-13 17:40:58 -0700
    Oh Kate! I’m so glad my words helped. It was (and still is) such a relief to me when I read what someone else writes and I go ME TOO!!

    Just one thing…IT DOES GET EASIER with the kids! And, like the grief, it mostly happens in imperceptible ways. I will be celebrating (marking, remembering) 9 years on Monday. Art wouldn’t recognize his kids now. The ramification of his loss hits them as they get older and can see all the milestones he will miss. And (there is no but…just and ‘and’) there is so much beauty in who they have become BECAUSE of his death. They are so kind and keep their friends grounded. They are thoughtful, so much more than they would have been if he had been alive. Their love for each other is simply indescribable. And we have become this protective unit. It’s sweet and good and most of the time pure (except when they fight with each or me with them!)

    My kids often find other kids who have lost. I tell them that’s because dented hearts are drawn to each other. They will be ok, just like you will. Not suddenly but day-by-day.
    Anway, I just wanted you to know that. Kim

  • commented on 8 Strangers 2018-03-25 22:30:01 -0700
    I remember writing this. It was after I attended the first meeting of a local support group of young widows. I had been hesitant about going to a support group, afraid it would make me feel sadder but it had the opposite effect. I didn’t have to explain what happened or hear “I can’t imagine what it’s like.” No one in this room had to imagine it. They were living it, like me.

    I’m still in touch with a few members of that group. We check in on each other 9 years later. I’m so grateful for this group and to Soaring Spirits for the same reason. With both, I realized that my grief would pass and that somehow, even though I didn’t know how, I would survive. They were right. I did.

  • posted about One-Time Donation on Facebook 2015-07-31 08:16:59 -0700
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Author: 100 Acts of Love: A Girlfriend's Guide to Loving a Friend Through Cancer or Loss, modern ways to help ur friend in crisis. Steward to 3. Widow.
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