When Does Grief End

Hey Y'all,

I'm short for words today, but wanted to share a poem I hope will help you as much as it has helped me.

When Does Grief End?

Grief hits us like a ton of bricks,

Flattens us like a steamroller,

Hurls us into the depths of despair.

We know in a flash when grief hits,

But when does it end?

Like the month of March,

Grief rushes in like a lion,

And tiptoes out like a lamb.

Sometimes, we don’t know when grief leaves,

Because we don’t let go of the lion’s tail.

Why do we hold on so long?

Grief offers us safety,

Protection from the world.

We don’t want to let go

Because we secretly fear

That we’ll forget our loved ones,

And we don’t want to forget- ever.

We don’t want to let go

Because we fear the future

And having to face life without our loved ones.

We don’t want to let go

Because we make the mistake

Of measuring our grief with the depth of our love-

When neither has anything to do with the other.

How do we know when grief has run its course?

How do we know when we’ve grieved enough?

Cried enough?

“Died” enough?

How do we know when it’s time to let go of the tail?

We know when we feel joy again, in something or someone.

Joy in living. Joy in life.

We know when we wake up in the morning

And our first thought is on something other than our loss.

We know when we look ahead with a smile

And back with fond memories,

And when we no longer dread the nights.

We know when our life starts filling up with new interests and people,

And we start reaching for the stars.

Grief ends when we let go of the tail.

--Margaret Brownley


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