on my terms

matt.jpgafter lunch with liz's friends
stopped at the dry cleaners.
the lady behind the counter
asked for the name.
“logelin”

she said,
“oh! did she have the baby?”
fuck.
how did she remember
liz?

i’m the one who did
most of the dry-cleaning runs.
“yes, she had the baby.”
(i hope she leaves it at that).

she said, 
“how is liz doing?”
double fuck.
now i have to answer that question.
“well, liz passed away the day after the baby was born.”
here come the tears
(both of us).

we talked about what
happened and how madeline 
is doing.
i left rather quickly
after that.
it was a tough encounter..

i’ve mentioned before
that i like to 
tell people about 
liz, 

but i realized today
that it has to be 
on my terms
and i have 
to be ready


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