Kaiti Wallace

Its Not Easy

On mother’s day just past I spent an hour trying to calm my three year old daughter because she didn’t want to get out of the shower. It was a huge tantrum that left the both of us floored and in tears. Admittedly for a while after John passed I let her walk all over me because I didn’t have the energy for a tantrum if she didn’t get her own way. So her behaviour problems towards me are my own fault. As I stood my ground with her and watched her tears fall while she kicked and screamed, I felt defeated. Though I stuck it out with her, for her, because she needs me to be strong. It’s not easy.  

 

 

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  • commented on Day Of Birth 2016-10-09 12:09:49 -0700
    Im so sorry Alicia, our stories are quite similar. John and i were also high school sweethearts who only reunited the year he passed away. Yes we are grateful but we feel robbed of our time. We should be living a full life.
    Two and a half weeks is very fresh and not too much helps to ease how you feel right now, please know you are not alone in this. About 2 weeks after my love passed i started writing in a journal all the memories we had made over the time that we had gotten to share together. I had journals from high school and there were things in it that i had forgotten we did. The journals soon after became letters to him. And each night for hours i would write to him about everything. Every emotion, every memory. I know you will find support and understanding here. Im so sorry you lost him, it never goes away but we learn to live with it. We adjust to life with grief and it is both beautiful and brutal. You will smile again, you will laugh again i promise, hold on beautiful. Sending you all my love and strength. Xox

  • commented on He Was My Addiction 2016-10-04 20:47:50 -0700
    Thank you all so much for your support, understanding and words of encouragement.

  • commented on Today I'am Ok But Not Everyday 2016-09-06 18:26:02 -0700
    There will be days that we fall backwards and days that we take a leap forward. As long as we hold hope, we will get through. Sending hope and strength to all.

  • commented on Happiness List 2016-08-29 20:37:41 -0700
    Thank you Beth and Stephanie. Sending you both love.

  • commented on Home Is Where The Heart Is 2016-08-15 17:10:34 -0700
    Thank you all for your comments, I decided to keep it all. I hung his clothes in the new wardrobe, I couldn’t keep them packed away. It was an emotional day to say the least. Thank you all so much.

  • commented on Uniquely Familiar Story 2016-08-07 02:03:31 -0700
    Thank you Lisa and Kelley x

Losing the love of her life in Dec 2015 at 27 her love is forever 29. She is a mother, writer, motivator and friend to everyone she meets. Embodying a strong mind and an open heart.
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