Linda Keeling commented on Driftwood 2017-10-14 14:10:56 -0700Welcome, Gabe….looking forward to more of your writing…..
Linda Keeling commented on Fear & Appreciation 2017-09-10 10:57:16 -0700Sarah… thanks for your post as it made me realize that I have had the same feelings but been pushing them aside.
I remarried a little over year ago… my husband husband is 11 years older… in excellent health….
We are in a great happy relationship…. yet I’ve been feeling as though something could change at any moment!
And I have to remind myself that I need to be living and appreciating THE moment… that right now Everything is ok… in fact, it is great… and I need to stay in the moment!
I hope and pray your day of dread becomes a day of delight.
Linda Keeling commented on Everything and Nothing 2017-09-02 05:39:38 -0700Kelley… this is all so true…. every word! You have to experience this to really get it!
Sometimes it seems so surreal.
I can wake up in the middle of the night from my snuggling new husband …. and then go to our memory shelf where both my John and his Judi are remembered with pictures and favorite things… and sit holding a picture of John telling him how much I miss him and love him.My new husband tells me he does the same.
This is not all the time… it is mostly occasionally… however sometimes more of often.
Yet my new husband and I love each other very much… we are very very happy…..
If you think about it too much it is impossible to make sense of it all.
I just go with it.
Thanks for putting the almost impossible feelings into words.
Linda Keeling commented on Parallel Lives 2017-08-25 20:13:09 -0700Kelley… you just described exactly what I have felt yet could never express in writing or verbally… thank you so very much.
It is thrilling to hear about you falling in love…..
Linda Keeling commented on Losing Pieces of You 2017-08-04 18:13:11 -0700I often have to look at John’s picture to remember his beautiful brown eyes …and then close my eyes to feel the realness of them.
I love to hear John stories…love to hear his name….
Great post, Kelley…..
Linda Keeling commented on Hiatus 2017-07-29 05:57:21 -0700Kelley… I have missed you the last couple weeks….I look forward to your posts….I was getting sad that you had decided to stop your posts.
Glad you are feeling better.
My sister had something very similar…ended up being a particular type of vertigo…she had to do specific head movements to get something in her ears back in balance.
Prior to these findings she was being evaluated for a cardiac event.
So happy for you in finding your next great love! It is amazing how our hearts are able to love our person who is no longer with us AND our new person!!!!
I married my new person a little over a year ago. He is a widower so I am his new person. We love each other very much and continue to love my John and his Judi…..
Starting SS in your area is exciting…I wished I lived closer I would participate…
Can’t wait for your book! Keep at it … it will get done!
Linda Keeling commented on Where Do They Go? 2017-07-10 13:58:01 -0700I have struggled with this…..so I look at pictures….I close my eyes in the quiet and force the memories… I can not nor want to forget
Linda Keeling commented on Meet Wendy and Ben 2017-07-10 12:10:57 -0700Welcome… sorry you are here yet looking forward to your writings…. you are not alone
Linda Keeling commented on New Love 2017-06-30 18:24:07 -0700So very happy for you, Kelley! I am in my next great love and you described it perfectly!
Linda Keeling commented on Eight Years and Crying 2017-06-04 18:09:22 -0700Sarah…..living the parallel life is so hard sometimes…I feel the same way being remarried and living a whole different life…yet my heart and head and thoughts slip back to my other life…
Though I love my husband and love my life…I miss what I had with my John….and often wonder what my (our) life be like if he were still here…..
We were married almost 5 years when he died….our 10 year wedding anniversary will be this August….we talked about this anniversary and how we were going to make it extra special!
This past May 8th marked 5 years for me too……
Thanks for sharing..always enjoy your posts.
Linda Keeling commented on Going Postal 2017-05-14 19:45:20 -0700Mike…I live in the same area you do….I just keep thinking that despite the weather I will be positive…..is has definitely been challenging…..and I have to fake it sometimes….
however, your advise to just go outside is right on…and look….it is only going to get better…thank God it is not freezing rain or snow…LOL
Linda Keeling commented on Hello, Dead Husband .... 2017-05-14 19:41:34 -0700Kelley…this was so from the heart….I could relate to all that you said…….you are too wonderful of a person inside and out to not find what you are wanting……..hang in there……and thanks for sharing what those of us can not put into words verbally or written….
Linda Keeling commented on Triggers 2017-05-14 19:38:30 -0700Kaiti….I so remember those days…I thought I was going to go crazy……had insomnia for months…….just trust that this days will become less and less…however, they will crept back again every now and then…..but won’t last as long, Thank God!!
Linda Keeling commented on Coping on the Hard Days 2017-05-14 19:35:24 -0700My mother passed away when I was young….I miss not being able to have pictures with her and sharing our lives together……you little get away sounds wonderful…you took care of yourself…..good for you.
Linda Keeling commented on The Public Face 2017-05-14 19:33:05 -0700Wow…so much to think about……!!!!
When I am overwhelmed like that I set short term plans….like, what can I do now and then re-evaluate in 30 days? Sometimes I have had to go a week a a time or less.
So, make the best decision now and then re-evaluated in ______________number of days…and then reassess…..
Thinking too far ahead will drive you crazy!!!!
Thoughts and prayers your way……
Linda Keeling commented on Holding a Hand 2017-05-02 18:49:07 -0700Mike..I get this…my John died at the Cleveland Clinic too…I was with him until his last breath and heartbeat…reading this made me cry…..going through what you and I went through will never be forgotten…..and these triggers are okay…..because we are still alive and feel and remember..thanks for sharing…I am sure this was hard to write.
Linda Keeling commented on You have a choice. 2016-12-19 19:57:00 -0800Michelle….you have put in words what I also believe and what I am trying to show by example to others in choosing to live life…..I got motivated to live my life because my John was denied his ability to live his life past age 56…and how he wanted to live, live , live…and how he lived his life to the fullest with the years he had…..
I woke up one day and said, “Linda, here you are moping around, living in a dark house…..only going to work because you had to pay your house payment so you can keep a shrine for John……waiting to quit living…..and there was John, struggling to hang on to every breathe….begging to be allowed to live a little longer….and was denied……..wow, how disrespectful can you be, Linda??? Here you have all this life…all these breaths…all these heartbeats….and you are wasting every single one of them.”
This really shook me to my core, and I made a conscientious choice to join the living again.
As for the why questions…well, I almost made myself insane with those……I came to realize there were no answers…..not on this side of living…..and the answers really did not matter……nothing explained could make the loss of John ever be “right”.
So everyday, I make the choice…..to live life…love life….and to have joy and happiness…..it is the least I can do for and WITH my John…who will live forever in my heart, and our memories and sharing all the John stories with others I can.
In the almost 5 years since my precious John died, I changed jobs, started dating, remarried 8 months ago to a widower, relocated to another home and location…..and we both are choosing to live our lives in honor of his Judi and my John.
I hope and pray your uncle will eventually learn to make the choice of living and not continue with anger and bitterness…..
And, Michelle…you just keep doing what you are doing…you are doing okay.
Linda Keeling commented on I have to go home 2016-11-24 16:34:18 -0800Aww…so sorry for this hard hard decision and time…..prayers your way.
Linda Keeling commented on Blunting the Knife 2016-11-22 18:40:50 -0800This is beautifully written…had not thought of the death anniversary as you described it…..thanks for sharing, Mike.
Linda Keeling commented on Celebrating the Tiny Victories 2016-10-23 07:37:43 -0700Good for you, Sarah…. I know the frustration though… I am in a new area too and the more I go out on my own the better I feel…